Don't Measure Your Worth By Your Work
For a long time I put my value in what I created, how well it did, how well it was received, not understanding how damaging that can be.
Because when it comes to a point in life where I need to be quiet and not do anything at all, I question who I am and what I'm worth.
I am not what I create, and as much as I'd like to think so, what I create and share doesn't even belong to me.
These gifts are out on a loan. They're great and fun and awesome, but God is GREATER... the GREATEST.
I never want to put my self worth and identity in my art, because at some point, I'll begin to worship it, and worship those who enjoy or hate it. And living on approval to acceptance is the ultimate bondage.
I think everyone just wants to feel like they have purpose... That in the Grand scheme of life, they're not forgotten. They are loved. They Matter.
And you do. We all do.
I have found that I have to CONSTANTLY remind myself to keep my worth, my joy, my identity in Christ himself. It helps when it comes to creating too.
"If this turns out to be garbage, I'm no less loved than when I started."
At worst, people are fickle. They are imperfect. They do really mean and cruddy things sometimes, and often without reason or remorse. They will throw you away as if you never mattered to them at all. They will break your heart and never say sorry.
And I am (still) learning and reminding myself EVERY DAY to put my heart in the Hands that created it.
It's super hard and often times it hurts so much. But trust me, He and His heart for you are the only things that are consistent.
If I never sing another song, write another page, take another picture, create another thing... He would still Love me. He would STILL find me worthy. He would NEVER abandon me. I would ALWAYS be relevant to Him.
So if you're anything like me, fight to keep your worth away from what you create.
Don't you know that you were BORN worthy? Loved? Accepted? Enough?